Love Unmasked
by shazeroon25
Summary: A re-working of my 2005 phic Love, The One Thing a Mask Cannot Hide
1. Chapter 1

Love unmasked

Sharon Pugh

**Chapter 1**

Christine idly traced her finger along the line of the book she was currently reading, suddenly realising that she had read that line at least five times already. Shaking her head, she blinked a few times and tried, hopelessly to focus her attention on the words spread out in front of her. It was her favourite book, one that had always eased her mind in troubled times, one that she had read many times since the first night she had met......him.

Sensing the futility in her efforts, Christine closed the book, and placed it on the table beside her. How on earth could she try and concentrate on reading a book when there was so much activity going on throughout the chateau. However, she had promised Raoul. Promised him that she would stay away from the main rooms while the preparations for their engagement celebration were taking place.

Wondering what to do with herself next, she gazed around the library, at all of the rows upon rows of books that had probably not even been touched for years. She slowly rose up from the chair and sighed, wondering if she would manage to read all of them in her lifetime. After all, what else would she do in this magnificent chateau that she now called home. The grounds of the chateau seemed to stretch on forever but she had no need to tend to even a single flower, not even to pick a leaf up from the lawn. Everything was done, before she had even stirred from her bedchamber in the morning.

The chateau itself was magnificent, just like the castles in every fairytale her father had read to her when she was a child. She had always wondered what it would be like to be a princess of one of those fairytale castles and now, in essence, she was. Although she felt more like a pampered pet than a princess.

Finally succumbing to the fact that she simply couldn't remain hidden away in the library any longer, she slowly made her way towards the kitchen, feeling certain that there was something she could do, no matter how small, to occupy her mind and stop her thoughts from wandering back..........back to those last few days at the Opera Populaire.

The pandemonium that greeted her as she entered the kitchen made her gasp. So many people, so much going on, chefs hurriedly throwing ingredients into huge pans and wiping sweat away from their brow, the sound of chopping and simmering and people hurrying everywhere around her. Just watching them rushing about made her feel quite giddy and exhausted. She could see Else, one of the kitchen maids who was manically darting from one side of the kitchen to the other preparing the ingredients for tonight's dinner. Then, she could see Claude, was anxiously looking at the food selection and occasionally making suggestions as to how it could be improved.

Sensing her presence was already a nuisance to all of the busy people in the kitchen, she stepped back into the corridor, hoping that she could be of some use elsewhere.

However, wherever she wandered, there were maids, and butlers scurrying around, frantically cleaning surfaces that were already gleaming and straightening pictures and all manners of furniture that really didn't need touching. Christine felt ashamed that she barely knew the names of half of these people who were rushing round for her and Raoul's benefit.

Finally, she entered the main room of the house and approached one of the maids who was frantically rubbing away a small, hardly noticeable mark on the piano, making sure there were not any further specks of dust to be seen.

"Please, let me help you. There must be something I can do"

"No madam" the maid looked most taken aback "It is our duty. The Viscount de Chagny doesn't want you to be troubled"

"Leave it all in our care Miss Daae" one of the other maids quipped "we all have strict instructions from the Viscount not to let you trouble yourself" she wiped a bead of sweat from her forehead and smiled "After all, you should be preparing for your Engagement Celebration"

Christine glanced over the maid's shoulder and could see Raoul gesturing wildly to another gentleman who was waving a piece of music in the air. She guessed that she should be preparing for the ball really but she couldn't stand to see all these people rushing around for her.

"I'm just not used to this kind of………" Christine couldn't find a word to describe the life she had been living since she and Raoul had made their love public knowledge. She took a deep breath and exhaled slowly "I'm not accustomed to people pampering me"

"You should get accustomed to it" Meg happily skipped into the room and embraced Christine "This chateau is every little girl's dream, its beautiful Christine"

"Oh Meg!" Christine smiled and returned the embrace "Its so good to see you. You look wonderful!"

"Thank you" Meg twirled around to show off the dress "I haven't worn this for ages, its my favourite"

"I am glad you are here, I was starting to think I would go crazy, wandering around the chateau" Christine admitted "Where's mother?"

Christine had always been used to thinking of Madame Giry as her mother, she had loved her and cared for her, almost as if she had been her own child ever since she had arrived at the Opera Populaire.

"She is around somewhere" Meg gazed around the room and took her friend's hand "You can't possibly be without something to do. There must be so much to explore"

"I want to do something to help, to do something useful" Christine shrugged and lowered her voice "Raoul won't let me do anything for this ball. I so badly need something to take my mind off......"

Meg frowned and looked questioningly at Christine

"You are getting married in four weeks Christine. Should that not be enough to…….." Meg faltered. She really didn't want to be the one to revive the Phantom in Christine's mind.

"You can talk about it, please do" Christine sighed "Its not as if.......its not as if I don't think about it......about him."

Christine walked towards the window that overlooked the chateau's beautiful gardens, anxious to continue their conversation away from the maids, who were no doubt wishing they could hear every word. Meg followed, and placed her hand, soothingly on Christine's arm.

"Christine, everything will be alright" she whispered. "In time"

"Everything is alright, it really is. I am so happy, how could I possibly be anything but happy. Look at me, look at this place." Christine forced a smile "I just can't help feeling…….."

Christine trailed off as Raoul approached them. His smile beaming, he threw his arms around the two girls.

"Are you talking about the ball?" without waiting for their response, he carried on excitedly, "It's going to be magnificent Christine. Our ballroom is breathtaking, there have been people working solidly on it for over a week. Its like a palace!"

Ballroom. That was another thing that Christine found hard to take in. She had spent most of her life living in a small room with many other girls at the opera house and to suddenly have acquired a ballroom, drawing room, dining hall and all the other many rooms in Raoul's Chateau was overwhelming.

Her favourite room of the whole chateau was her bedchamber, it had been decorated the previous week in all of Christine's favourite colours and patterns. It felt wonderful and yet slightly unnerving to have a whole room all to herself. However, she wouldn't have long to grow accustomed to that, in four weeks she would be sharing Raoul's bedchamber, as his wife, Christine De'Chagny.

As the thought of her impending marriage entered her mind, she felt the usual mix of emotions that came with it. Excitement, confusion, elation, anxiety and the usual fluttering sensation in her stomach. She smiled as she wondered how delighted her father would be to see all this. He had been very fond of Raoul whenever he had visited her at that little cottage by the sea all those years ago. So many years ago and yet, here she was, engaged to Raoul, her childhood sweetheart. She had barely even entertained the hope of ever seeing him again in her lifetime, let alone being his bride.

After the Opera House had been destroyed in the disaster, Christine had had no choice but to accept Raoul's offer to move into his Chateau and reside in a separate room until their wedding day. Not that she regretted it, not at all, it was just that her mind was a constant whirl of confusion lately.

It had been two months since the disaster and each and every night the Phantom had penetrated her dreams somehow. Last night, all she could remember dreaming was being in the gondola with the Phantom, the both of them singing beautifully. However, when she had looked up at the Phantom, all she could see was hurt and betrayal in his eyes, unlike when they had really been in the boat when he had looked at her so fondly, with such love and…….

Christine inwardly chided herself for these crazy thoughts and resolved to concentrate on the night's festivities.

"Oh Raoul, I'm sure it will be wonderful" She lightly kissed Raoul on the cheek and gazed into his beautiful brown eyes "but I feel so useless. People are rushing everywhere to get things prepared and I want to do something".

"Christine, please. You have plenty of things you could do" Raoul returned the kiss on Christine's lips then turned to Meg. "Take her to her room and help her to get ready Meg. Not that she needs very long to make herself beautiful"

"Yes, come Christine. I cannot wait to see your dress" Meg linked her arm through Christine's.

"Now I must go and talk to the conductor of the orchestra again" Raoul run his hands through his hair in exasperation. "Can you believe that he was thinking of including excerpts from Don Juan in tonight's selection?! How thoughtless"

"How inconsiderate" Christine sadly wished that maybe she could hear her angel's music one last time. But she knew now was not the time. "Did he not know of what happened?"

"We don't need our night marred by memories of HIM" Raoul had clearly not heard a word she had said, his facial features tightening "Not tonight of all nights"

"Tonight will be perfect" Christine tried to convince them both as she wrapped her fingers around his "Nothing can spoil it Raoul, nothing"

"There is one thing that really would make it the perfect night" Raoul's frown seemed to melt away as he looked upon his future bride "If you would indulge us all with your voice. There are so many people who are asking...."

"No" Christine spoke quickly, tearing her hand away from his "Please Raoul"

"Oh Christine!" Meg beamed "It has been so long since you sang"

"I don't understand" Raoul's eyes looked sad as he noticed the evident fear in his fiancee's eyes "I know you haven't sung since...."

He struggled to find the words to convince her

"Even without rehearsal, you have a far superior voice than anyone who will be present tonight" he pressed "It would give us great pleasure if you would sing for us.....for me"

"Oh no please!" Christine shook her head pleadingly "Don't make me sing. I couldn't. I haven't sung since that night.... don't make me do it now"

"Very well" Raoul kissed her gently on her forehead "I shan't press you any further. I must go, I have things to attend to"

With that, Raoul strode away, heading towards the already flustered conductor of the orchestra.

"Why will you not sing anymore?" Meg looked concerned "It seems such a waste. After everything that happened...."

"I just can't" Christine stopped her, all this talk was not helping her troubled mind at all "Please Meg, don't ask. I miss singing, I miss it with all my heart but, I caused so much...... so much pain, so much misery. I wish I had never...."

"No, you are wrong Christine" Meg interrupted "None of it was your fault, none of it"

"You know that's not true" Christine protested "If I had never sang, if he had never loved me...."

"You would still be a chorus girl" Meg concluded "And maybe Raoul would never have even noticed you, hidden away in the crowd. What happened, happened for a reason Christine, to ensure your future happiness, with Raoul"

"I hope I really can make Raoul happy" Christine admitted

"You already have by agreeing to marry him" Meg coaxed Christine along the long corridor towards her bedchamber. "Now come on Christine, I need to see your dress, no more talk of the past. There is so much to do"

Sensing her friend's reluctance, she slowed her pace and turned Christine to face her.

"Raoul really does love you so" Meg smiled "He just doesn't want you to feel hurt anymore. He wants it all to be over Christine"

"It is" Christine stopped "He knows that. He just can't keep hiding me away from everything, I am going to remember, how could I forget?"

"Well, put all that out of your mind tonight Christine, you need to celebrate your engagement to your very own Prince Charming" Meg wanted to draw Christine's thoughts away from the darkness of the past. She couldn't understand why Christine couldn't just lock these thoughts away. There were so many other things she could be thinking of.

Meg skipped ahead and giggled happily "the ball, your wedding, your future, its all looking so good Christine. I feel I could die of excitement for you"

"Oh Meg, I am so lucky to have you as a friend" she hugged her closely

"Time will heal everything you know" Meg took Christine's hand and led her into the room, closing the door behind her.

Outside her bedchamber, Christine could still hear the muffled voices of the busily finishing off last minute preparations. Drawing her attention to her dress, she smoothed it out on the bed for Meg to see.

"Its wonderful" Meg almost squeaked with excitement "You are going to look beautiful! You are so so lucky Christine"

Christine had to admit that Meg was right, she was lucky. She had a bright, rich future in front of her with the man she loved. She knew how much Raoul clearly loved her, more than life itself and what was in the past was just that. In the past. Something to be thought of with a mixture of fondness and regret.

So why then, did Christine feel such unease.


	2. Chapter 2

LOVE UNMASKED

Sharon Pugh

**CHAPTER 2**

After Meg had left to leave her to get ready, Christine smoothed out her dress, and tried to fix her mind on the details of it, just to stop her thoughts leading to where they always led. The dress was like nothing Christine had ever seen, beautiful white satin and lace stretched down to the floor, like a cascade of beauty. Carefully, so as not to crease the material, Christine lifted the dress over her head and slid it down over her body. Then turning to her hair, she swept it up into a bun and watched as some curls escaped and framed her face. Looking at her reflection in the mirror, she reminded herself how lucky she was. Raoul really did give Christine the best of what life could offer. Only the finest wine would ever touch her lips and only the finest materials would grace her body, and yet she yearned for the one thing that he couldn't possibly give her.

Although she fought desperately against herself, what she really wanted was to see the Phantom. Her angel of music. Without him in her life, she felt a little lost. The thought of even singing one note, let alone a whole song, filled her with dread for how could she sing after she had betrayed her angel so badly. She had condemned him to a life alone, broken his heart and after all he had taught her, the gift he had given her. Since she had abandoned her angel back at the Opera Populaire, she had lost the courage, the ability and even the desire to sing.

"_Wandering child, so lost, so helpless,_

_Yearning for my guidance"_

The Phantom's words crashed into her mind, and as usual, all other thoughts were pushed firmly to the back of her mind. He had been right after all. Without his guidance, she was lost, without his tuition, even if she wanted to, she very much doubted that she could sing now. The thought of singing in front of anyone made her feel such immense terror, she felt sick to the stomach.

Angrily, she looked away from the mirror and hated herself for allowing the Phantom to constantly invade her mind. She couldn't understand why she felt this invisible pull towards him. All she knew was that now the Phantom was no longer guiding her, she had ceased to feel anything but numbness and despair. Her love for Raoul was real, he made her happy and she knew that she would always love him but her affection for the Phantom was equally as real and as powerful and she felt unmeasurable guilt at how she had betrayed him. All he had done was love her, love her and help her achieve her dreams.

"_He is a murderer!!!"_

Christine reminded herself out loud. She knew that she should not ever forget the tragic deaths that had occurred out of his love for her. Could such unpleasantness really be borne out of love? What kind of love was that? Evil, dark, ruthless. And yet those words didn't seem to fit with the man she had grown to love in the darkness of the Phantom's lair.

"I shall never forget what you did for me" Christine raised her eyes above, as if hoping her words would reach him.

Suddenly, a soft tap at the door interrupted her thoughts.

"Christine, can I come in?" Raoul softly spoke

"Of course" Christine smiled.

The sound of his voice, her beloved's voice drew her back to the present, chasing the dark clouds away. THIS was what love was, surely, a happy thing, a bright sensation, filled with sunshine and joy. Not death and destruction.

Raoul entered the room and handed her a giant bouquet of white roses.

She took the flowers from him and smiled up at him brightly. She knew she loved Raoul, completely and utterly, she had been smitten with him ever since she was a child. She knew that this love was pure, healthy and that she should absorb every pleasure that came of it. Alas, At the same time, deep down in her soul, she knew that her longing to see the Phantom was increasing every day, painfully so, but that was something she knew she must never do. Fulfilling her need to meet with the phantom, even just one more time, was the one thing that would crush Raoul, and she couldn't do that. She mustn't.

"You look beautiful Christine" Raoul touched her cheek and run his hand over her face "But then you always did, you always have"

"Oh Raoul" Christine's eyes beamed as she admired the roses "Thank you Raoul, they are lovely"

"I must be the luckiest man alive" Raoul's smile faltered

"Raoul" Christine placed the flowers on her dressing table and looked worryingly at her fiancé "What is wrong?

"Its nothing.....I" Raoul failed to find the words to describe the many feelings that had clouded over his happiness over the last few weeks.

Every time he looked upon his sweet Christine, the love of his life, he had felt a sickening feeling of unease. He often questioned of himself why love had to feel this way? He had always, throughout his life, felt confident, completely sure of himself and had never even contemplated failure. He had never needed to, everything he had ever wanted, worked for, every business venture he had ploughed money into, had always been a complete success.

Including winning Christine.

He had won her heart, and now he was about to take her hand in marriage and he felt happier than he ever thought could be possible. And yet, for the first time in his life, he felt insecure. Scared that, somehow, she would be taken away from him. That he would lose her.

No matter how he despised him, he always felt that when it came to Christine, he had an affinity with the phantom. After all, they both clearly both loved her, would do anything for her and both of them felt completely broken at the thought of losing her.

But he, Raoul, had won her affections. He had to remind himself of that daily, she was his, she loved him. She had chosen HIM. And yet every time he reminded himself of this, the painful image of his love kissing that.....that monster, clouded his reason. The way she had looked into the phantom's eyes, the painful expression of emotions that Raoul could never even begin to understand, haunted both his thoughts and dreams.

"I find it hard to believe that no-one is ever going to take you away from me. I…." He reluctantly confessed

Christine placed the roses on her bed and lightly touched her finger to his lips to silence him.

"Raoul, nothing will ever take me from you" she promised "You must know that I love you"

He nodded slowly, frowning again, trying to think of how best to express how he felt.

"That night..." he began "At the Opera Populaire, I just can't help...... remembering"

"Don't, please" Christine soothed "No more, we cannot keep going over and over...."

"I will always try to make you happy Christine" Raoul embraced her "I promise you, anything you want, its yours"

Christine broke away from the embrace and looked away from him, knowing that what he said could never possibly be true. She wanted what he couldn't or wouldn't ever want to grant her.

"No more of this talk. We have a celebration to attend"

Picking up the roses, Christine kissed Raoul on the lips and smiled."I am going to find a vase for these and then I will join you in the Ballroom"

Raoul watched as she slid down the corridor in her beautiful dress. She really was exquisite, every detail about her was unique, breathtaking. He loved her more than anything and was determined that he would devote his life to making her happy. He had to do that, not just for him, not just for Christine but for the Phantom. As much as he hated him, his own love for Christine made him aware of how much the phantom had loved Christine and how crushing it must have been to lose her. Raoul couldn't even begin to think of how he would feel if he lost her. He prayed every night in the hope that that would never happen.

Shaking his head as if to rid himself of such thoughts, he resolved to concentrate on the ball and slowly made his way to the Ballroom to see if there was anything more he could do before the guests arrived.


	3. Chapter 3

LOVE UNMASKED

Sharon Pugh

**CHAPTER 3**

Taking a deep breath, Christine entered the ballroom to be greeted by what looked like a sea of beautiful dresses, stretching out endlessly. A happy throng of people seemed to blur together in a mass of colour and noise and she couldn't help but gasp at the sight of the crowds. It seemed that Raoul had invited the whole of Paris.

Jovial conversation seemed to surround her as she desperately searched the room for a friendly, familiar face. Where on earth were Meg and Madame Giry?

As a few people started to notice her presence, a gradual swarm of the pretty dresses made their way towards her and she could vaguely make out a few awe filled exclamations at the sight of her engagement ring and her dress. Trying desperately to focus on the several conversations that were being hurled from all directions at her, she suddenly wished that she could turn back and escape to her bedchamber.

She became aware of several women battling each other for her hand, aiming to get a better look at her engagement ring. Another round of envious and complimentary exclamations ensued as she slowly retrieved her hand and forced a smile. She felt lost in the hustle and bustle, as if she wasn't truly there, as if she were just watching the scene unfolding in front of her.

"Christine?" one of the ladies waved a hand in front of her face "I just said, you must be very happy to be marrying the Viscount?"

"Y-Yes of course, I'm sorry for my rudeness" Christine apologised "It's just, all these people, I am a bit overwhelmed"

"Overwhelmed?" another lady laughed "You shall have to get used to this sort of affair Miss Daae, now that you are to be the wife of the Viscount De Chagny"

"And here he is now" Another lady practically squealed with excitement as Raoul approached them "Isn't he handsome?"

Barely noticing the cooing women surrounding his fiancée, Raoul gently kissed her on the cheek and tugged gently at her arm,

"Come Christine. Lets go and commence the celebrations"

Glad to be rescued from her torment, Christine allowed him to lead her to the centre of the ballroom. Raoul looked over at the conductor who silenced the orchestra. Gratitude turned to mortification as she realised that Raoul was going to draw even more attention to herself than she had already received.

"Raoul please, I don't want any fuss"

"Ladies and gentlemen" Raoul continued, unaware of his fiancee's discomfort "As you may already know, Miss Christine Daae has consented to be my wife"

A few congratulatory cheers rose from the well wishers as Raoul beamed with obvious delight.

"I cannot begin to tell you how happy she has made me" He raised Christine's hand and kissed it, to the further amusement of the crowd. "Two months ago I thought I was going to lose her but...."

Christine could see a tear in Raoul's eye and gently touched his shoulder,

"Raoul, please don't. You mustn't think about…………"

"Yes, of course, you are right" Raoul brushed the tear away and addressed the people "Tonight is about the future. A happy one. Please everybody raise your glasses"

Everybody did as he commanded.

"To the future!!!!" Raoul declared and everyone joined in the toast. "Now please, everybody dance, and enjoy the copious amounts of food and drink on offer"

As the orchestra started up again, Raoul swept Christine into a dance and kissed her, passionately on the lips.

"I love you Miss Daae" he looked into her eyes as they danced

"I love you too" Christine blushed, aware of all the eyes that were fixed on them both right now.

As the night went on, she relaxed into the dancing and resolved to make an effort and at least try to get into the spirit of things. When she had finally found Meg and Madame Giry, the night was altogether more pleasurable and she felt much more at ease. As a whole, the ball had been very enjoyable, a true celebration of a bright and promising future.

She finally managed to excuse herself from the ball a few hours later. Despite enjoying the celebrations, she felt extremely tired and after repeatedly reassuring Raoul that she was not ill, just exhausted, she made her way back to her bedchamber, leaving the jovial crowd to carry on the celebrations in the ballroom

She had barely lay down on the bed when tiredness lulled her into a dream where she was suddenly transported back into the dancing crowds. Only now, she was fully embracing being the centre of attention and dancing as if she would never stop. She felt so full of spirit, so full of life. Round and round she seemed to go, passing from partner to partner as dizziness started to set in. Briefly closing her eyes in an effort to ease the dizziness, she became aware that she was suddenly dancing with a new partner yet again. Laughing happily, she opened her eyes, suddenly face to face with....

HIM!

Christine sat upright on the bed, still fully clothed in her ball dress, her eyes squinting to make out what was going on.

"Oh god!"

In her confused, half asleep state, she tried to make out where she was. In her bedroom of course, the familiar surroundings gradually became visible as her eyes became accustomed to the moonlight. Her heartbeat slowly started to resume to a normal pace and she gently exhaled the breath she had been holding since she had awoke.

"Please stop haunting me" she whispered into the darkness of her room.

She glanced at the small clock on her bedtable and, realising that the ball was probably almost over by now, decided to go for a walk in the grounds. Maybe that would help ease her troubled mind, which was still haunted by the dream.

She glanced out through her window at the moonlight and draped her cloak around her shoulders. Slipping quietly down the stairs, she passed the kitchen where many people where tidying up and talking about the ball. Unseen, she made her way out through the big oak doors and walked down to the river where the moonlight seemed to be dancing a mysterious dance in its reflection in the water. Folding her arms around her body to keep warm, Christine listened to the silence for a short while and then quietly sang to herself,

"Night-time sharpens

Heightens each sensation

Darkness stirs

And wakes imagination

Silently the senses, abandon their defences"

"That was a spectacular ball. What a lucky, lucky girl you are Christine Daae" Carlotta silenced Christine with her voice "If only the rest of us were so lucky as to have a Phantom singing tutor"

"Carlotta.....I didn't know you were here" Christine hoped she had not been listening to what she had been singing

"I am waiting for my carriage" Carlotta walked towards her and gestured towards the chateau "Maybe I too would be living in a chateau as grand as this if your phantom friend had taught me"

Carlotta laughed, a low sarcastic laugh and touched Christine's face, with her red satin gloved hand,

"But how silly of me. I forgot that he only gives lessons to young impressionable girls like you. Naive, silly girls who he can lure to his lair and...."

"It wasn't like that" Christine angrily pushed Carlotta's hand away "It wasn't like that at all. He taught me so much…….about music"

Carlotta raised an eyebrow, then turned away to gaze at her reflection in the river, with obvious admiration. Her long, red satin dress trailed around her body and seemed to swish every time she moved. She momentarily walked away from Christine and angrily swirled around.

"There are many things that can be taught" she spat "Fine breeding is not one of them. You are a chorus girl Christine and that is how you should remain. Without the Phantom's tuition, you are nothing"

"I couldn't agree more" Christine whispered "I never meant to upstage you Carlotta. Like you, I was just realising my dream"

"Well thanks to you, we have all lost our dreams in a cloud of smoke" Carlotta's arms were gesturing wildly.

She took a deep breath,

"But life goes on. I will be playing the part of Violetta in a new production of La Traviata. Shame, you didn't go to the audition Christine"

"I didn't have to" Christine smiled "I was offered the part without auditioning. I turned it down"

"You are mad" Carlotta frowned "It's a wonderful opportunity. As much as I despise you Christine, I cannot understand why you would give up such a chance. However, it is my gain"

"Please Carlotta, don't hate me" Christine turned away "I never meant for this to happen. None of it. I wish I had never …"

"I know, I shouldn't hate you" Carlotta reluctantly agreed "As I said, you are just a very lucky girl, lucky…….. and talented"

Carlotta seemed almost embarrassed and extremely annoyed to have been forced to admit this. She turned away and looked down, seeming excruciatingly uncomfortable.

"Thank you" Christine wiped a tear from her eye

"You need to pull yourself together Christine" Carlotta looked up, and folded her arms "Raoul can give you anything you want in the world, but I cannot see you being happy with just existing. Its not you"

Carlotta stared straight at Christine who was deep in thought.

"You need to use your talent" she warned "Otherwise, you might wake up one day and realise that it is gone"

With that, Carlotta turned and walked away and Christine listened to the swishing of her dress then sank to the ground and put her head in her hands.

Carlotta was right, she knew that if she didn't sing soon, everything her angel had taught her would slip away, bit by bit. Everything he had done for her, good or bad, would all have been for nothing. It pained her greatly to think of letting him down so badly but that is what she had done. She had completely betrayed him, in every way possible.

She knew that she at least owed it to her angel to ensure that she never forgot or lost any of the skills he had taught her but just the mere thought of singing again..... she simply had no desire to. Not now.......Without knowing that her angel was there, listening to her and guiding her, the thought of a crowded house applauded her held no appeal. It would mean nothing if he was not there to share his thoughts on her singing and how she could progress.

And yet, she knew there was something missing in her life now. She had never felt so happy as when she had been singing in the Opera Populaire. She deeply missed that sensation and it saddened her to think that she may never feel that way again.

Would she really never sing again?

That thought depressed her to the core but, at the same time, she knew she simply couldn't do it, not without her angel. She would need to see him again, to seek his guidance, to be her inspiration.

But how??

She couldn't just visit him. For a start, the Opera Populaire had been deemed extremely unsafe to all, which is why the police had not ventured any further in their search for the Phantom. Should she risk going back in there, she may badly injure herself or worse......she might actually find the Phantom, and what would that achieve?

He surely wouldn't welcome her with open arms, not after the way she had abandoned him that night. Besides, seeing him would be betraying Raoul and she really didn't want to hurt even more people.

It felt so unfair that the one thing she desperately needed to do, was the one thing she mustn't do. And yet, she couldn't imagine spending her whole life wondering what could have been had she dared to take a chance...... to realise her dreams again.

Slowly, she dragged herself up from the ground and wiped down her dress. Again, she felt that her actions were not her own and that her innermost desires and dreams were urging her on, to do what, she didn't know. Again, she was a slave to her own heart and she knew that sense and practical reasoning were going to be of little help to her now.

She walked back into the Chateau and, oblivious to the kitchen staff around her, she scrambled about in the kitchen, searching for a candle. She then made her way to the stables and pushed open the door. Quickly, she chose the nearest horse and scrambled onto its back. It was highly unladylike to ride bareback like this but there was no time to worry about that now. She had to go to the Opera Populaire and she had to go now, before she changed her mind.


End file.
